the next chapter of my life

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To us photographers, we have always been taught to look for the right light.
Find it. Feel it. Capture it. Make it look authentic. And repeat. Redo. Remake.
We do it incessantly. We are hunted by it everywhere we go. There is never a moment when we are not looking at the light and rather at our subject matter’s expression only. We see the light. We frame it perfectly on whomever or whatever it is we have to photograph and then we search for more light, more shadows on someone’s face, more hidden folds on someone’s dress, more shinning reflections and strong beams all over.
We are tireless, obsessive, almost compulsively looking for that triangle of light that will give our images the best texture and that will hide imperfections and identify qualities.

The magical light that will reveal it all, but keep it concealed at the same time.

But what about if the light we are chasing and constantly photographing is indeed something we should look closely into for ourselves? What if we had to stick with it? Stay with it and see until it turn darker and darker when we cannot see it anymore? Go in, inside that light very little until it is not good anymore. And not photograph it, but only feel it for ourselves.

What if we became the subject matter for a bit and were put on the stage, but nobody was behind to take our pictures? We just stood still. Frozen in the space between light and darkness, between the taking of the image, and the moment right before and right after the shutter closes…

I am here now.
The light is mine to steal.
I am suspended in the space between.
And I will be here for a bit.
Just the time to take the light in.
And breath it back out.
I am here now.
Immovable. Still.
Taking it in.
And it is here I am supposed to be.
The light is mine to steal.
Will hold on to it until I need.

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