exactly a year ago


Exactly a year ago I was in Jerusalem, Israel getting accustomed with the religious Satmar of Meah Shearim.
This photo was taken from a car I hid myself in after I was caught photographing something I was not allowed to by this little girl who threatened to call her father if I did not stop doing what I was doing. So I did put my big camera down, smiled courteously and walked *(ran) away but kept my smaller one at hand while literally just stepping inside this random white car parked in the middle of the street and hiding in the back seat as if I belonged in it. Now I literally laugh thinking about the whole ride home I got from this random man whose car I was in, but once I was there it did not feel as fun as it is with the insight of a year gone bye.

In any case, my point being that…now that I am preparing to put together all the images I took within these years to make my first book I am re-living the daily adventures all over again. And this is making me both happy and very lonesome. I have this constant feeling of home-sickness for places that were never really my home if not for a week or two or maybe few months, and for some people who were never really my family, but, somehow, they have served me as “surrogate parents” towards the discovery of my hidden Jewish soul. As I sit on my Brooklyn desk looking at the pink sky of a very hot summer sunset, I believe I belong here just as much as I belong anywhere. There is really no limits to the discovery of self-boundries and no-limit to the tools one has to rely on to get there.

As I type on the white sheets of paper the order of words I would like to appear on the pages of such book I am going to call mine in few months, I feel I am still full of controversy within my love and hate for my Judaism roots and I am not entirely sure how I fit into the whole Italian, Jewish picture at all, but I am still very willing to see through it and analyze every little piece of it until one day or maybe never I will call a place home and a religion my own and a nationality my birth-right…

As confusing as it all sounds, I still sit at this desk days in and days out reminiscing steps of a closed-by past that has lending me the footprints for an unknown future to call my own.

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